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Burrows and Badgers - Chaos at the crossroads.

In the rundown vestry, a fire flickered in the grate while lanterns cast long shadows across the room. Benedict Otterbranch, captain of the Inquisition Warband known (for unknown reasons) as the 'Unused', steepled his paws and looked down from the lectern at the extremely portly mole friar shifting uncomfortably on a bare wooden pew.
"So, as you can tell, we had quite the time getting here Brother Moleasticlies. As you are no doubt aware, we have been sent here by the Mother Church to investigate the lack of funds either being put into this fine establishment, or any of the charities for the needy in the environs."
The mole looked up with watery eyes and started to mumble under his whiskers.
"We have carefully asked around the village, and despite some really VERY generous donations, including by some very affluent landholders, this church appears to have nothing at all in the coffers. Poor as church mce, I believe is the phrase. I would estimate you have converted quite a lot of these donations into your stomach, where, dear brother, is the rest?"
The mole again mumbled something unintelligable, even though his pockets and purse jingled uncomfortably loudly.
A stoat in a monk's habit slid up to the mole, causing it to jump nervously, "You have a lovely village here, beautifully laid out. But everyone appears to be afraid of you. Not the usual reaction to one of your order, dedicated to abstinence, piety and charity"


The stoat continued, "We arrived, were immediately greeted by these two fine gentlemice here; Humphrey the School Mouse and Arthur the Church Mouse. Unusually, they were armoured and armed, and they were insistent on joining us. Why would these two fine gentlemice, pillars of the community, want to do that?"


"We were also joined by this incredibly skillful young mouse, Jeni Brokenstripe." The otter gestured at a small, demure young mouse, sitting nursing a series of wounds that were magically healing, while juggling two bloodstained knives across her paws, cleaning the stains with a silk rag that also flew through the air lazily. "Why would a member of the local Battledancer tribe insist on meeting us too? They normally avoid us church types and keep themselves to themselves when the laws are concerned? Unusual that, but a Battledancer is an always welcome addition to any one."
"What was more interesting," the stoat added, "was that we were also greeted by some rather unsavoury Royalists, led by a feist hound, a witch and a hare. They demanded we leave immediately, trooping up and down, waving some blue dishcloth on a stick. Their feist was really having a go at you Captain Otterbranch, I could see your hackles raising."
"That is rather unusual behaviour," the Otter captain continued, "They even started threatening us. All we wanted to do was meet with you at the Moot Hall and discuss what was going on in a civil manner."


"Now, Humphrey here, being a learned mouse," the Stoat fixed the mole in the eye, "had fortunately brought the village flag with him, right and proper. It should be flown in this fair town by your charter documents. It even shows the legendary Black Bear of Mort-shire. It's rather impressive. Now, why would you deny your village's history?"
"My learned brother here was brutally assaulted by a rather heavily armed hedgehog."
"She's well known in the area, she's called Brianna. So sorry to interrupt ." A grey mouse interjected.
"As a friend of the Unused, you are most welcome, do not be timid my friend". The Otter laughed. "That hedgehog was hammered by his blessed skills rather knocked the wind out of it," the otter pointed at the stoat, "while the Royalist's feist boss hit out at our friend, the battledancer, here."


"Hitting an unprotected lady. That's always a mistake!" Humphrey the mouse interjected. "I jumped one of their mouse warriors. My holy friend Arthur here set out to smite thier witch."
"All in the name of the Holy Mother Church." The embarrassed church mouse blushed, "it worries me that we would be drawing attention to all the poor unfortunates in the village, accused of witchcraft, such as the local midwife."
"You mean the newt who brews a few herbs to take away pains, and fixes broken bones. Why would we hae any beef with someone working for her community. Brother Moleasticlies, I feel, may have been a little jealous."
"Meanwhile, everyone else was rather involved in the middle of the crossroads, beating each other up!" The Otter grinned, "their hare even got involved, waving that dishcloth over us all."


"I feel awful for hitting a lady, but the Witch had to be purged," Arthur blushed, "Good thing she was not a tough battledancer like you M'lady." the Church Mouse shrugged.
"Tough! Do you know how many of those beasts hit me?" The Battledancer raised an eyebrow.
"It did allow my righteous friend and I to pile in the damage on that Hare, but your hits were really impressive M'lady!" Otterbatch waved a paw from the lectern, "The feist caused me no end of hurt, I think we were all in danger of going out of action M'lady. Humphrey was certainly bleeding as bad as yours. The Hare tried to show their colours and rally the Royalists, but they were not keen on the flag idea."


"Thankfully, we took him down quickly, Captain," the stoat smiled. "They even dropped their precious flag to the tiles."


Arthur looked at his friend, "Humphrey, you certainly were taking a lot of damage, are you recovered?"


"I'm fine, healing nicely. Glad you came charging in with that great ax of yours, it allowed me to slip away and borrow their flag!" Humphrey grinned triumphantly, "It will look rather excellent as an offering to the Great Mother, hanging in the Nave of the church, don't you think?"
"Sorry, I was a bit busy taking down their third mouse, the skilled warrior, what were you saying?" The stoat grinned at the mole friar, "Your little plan to interrupt our meeting was falling apart rather quickly."


"With both the mouse and the feist taking tumbles. The Royalists had fought on for a long time, but with their leaders gone, they were not sticking around to help you." The stoat put a paw on the mole's shoulder. "Now, we have a lot to talk about, or rather you will be having lots of interesting chats with the Mother Church in Roma about your financial mishandling." The Otter hit his hammer back on the lectern, "Take him away please."


The Mole, soon bound and with his claws trimmed, was led out by a hooded Fox Illuminator who stepped out of the shadows.
"You will be on a ship within a day, hope being seasick doesn't make you loose too much weight!" The stoat giggled.
"Humphrey," the Otter laughed, "do me a favour, get that bear flag of yours where it is meant to be, on the church flagpole!"
"Think we will be staying here a while," his stoaty friend smiled.
"The Royalist all recovered I hear." The school mouse added.
"Unfortunately, their feist leader did not survive, and they might be looking for revenge." Jeni mused, dancing her knife off fingertips.
The whole band dispersed to do errands, they had all picked up skills. Jeni Brokenstripe, after helping out a money lender for 8 pennies, had in a spare moment, and after lots of nagging, taught Humphrey how to throw daggers. They had gained a lot of materials and a further twenty pennies cash from beating up the Royalists. They had taken down a witch, which earned them seven pennies from the Church as bounty, and Captain Benedict had hit and helped take down the feist leader, gaining more notoriety. A slaver was hit hard, and a hedgehog freed, who joined the witch hunters, as well as a quartermaster and black marketeer, who provided a lot of equipment, including a magical vest of light armour. While a visit to the forest shrine by the Captain had earned extra fate.

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